Doing it Anyway

Last week I wrote a post about how I plan to become a runner.  I was overwhelmed with the amount of support I received from my friends and other random bloggers I had never heard of before.  But, as the week went on, and the new excitement wore off, I lost my motivation. Let's face it, I am lazy.  I started to believe that unless there is a 75% sale at the outlet mall, I would not be running. I was so mad at my self for losing motivation before I even started.  I kept thinking my health was the perfect excuse to slack off and not do it, claiming my lungs would hold me back.

I had an appointment with my doctor yesterday for my six month follow up.  He mentioned my plans for running and I quickly replied with (a hopeful), "but if you think that is stupid just tell me and I won't do it".  He laughed and said it would be more stupid to not do it.  So, that was that; I am going to start running.

I left the office building feeling incredibly intimidated about the goals I had made for myself, and thinking I would fail before I even started.  I got in my car to head home and that's when I heard about Boston.  If I was looking for another excuse to not run, that would be it.

By the time that I got home and turned on the news the initial shock had worn off.  But, instead of feeling relief that I finally had an excuse.  I was actually just plain mad.   I was mad that my good friend had to go though such a nerve wracking day (Amy works in the Prudential Center building.  The finish line was right about in front of it).  I was mad that one person would chose to rob hundreds of athletes' accomplishments. Mad at myself for even considering using such a tragic event as an excuse to not better my self.

I spent the rest of the night doing anything I could to motivate myself.  Looking at blogs, downloading Jeff Galloway's app, and window shopping for new running shoes.    I'm starting at an 18 min mile.  I am not really sure if it can get much easier than that.  It may be a challenge, but I am doing it anyway.