Tuesday, March 25, 2014

we won't accept NO

First of all, I want to say thank you for a the well wishes, and prayers. From your comments, to emails, and text messages I felt so loved.  I was really apprehensive to publish such a personal struggle. But I am so glad that I did, because I realized that a lot of my friends have gone through the same thing and now have multiple children.  It gives my dying hope a little bit to feed off of, and this past week that was greatly needed.  

I have received a lot of emails asking me what I have tried and if I ever heard of such and such all natural method, and all sorts of other recommendations.  Without going into a lot of detail I will say that I tried a few natural methods before going to the doctor, they all failed.  Yes, I have had my thyroid checked.  Yes, they tested me (twice) for PCOS and a whole slew of other things.  Supposedly, everything is "within normal limits".  I am on my second cycle of a second kind of medication and it seems to be failing.  I will say that I have a lot of confidence in my doctor, and he has a lot of confidence that I will become pregnant.

I understand that there are a lot of families out there that have struggled for much longer than we have.  And I get that it's not over yet.  Often times my emotional understanding (or lack there of), gets in the way of my logical thinking. But, I'm human, that is bound to happen.  I have good days and bad.  Yesterday was a bad day.  Yesterday I had to take a sick day and stay home.  It was a pretty emotional weekend for me, and I woke up with a killer migraine that wouldn't let up.  I stayed in bed most of the day. The last time I was in bed most of the day was when I had just gotten out of the hospital.  The fact that it was my birth control that caused me to get so sick a year and a half ago, is kinda like rubbing salt in my wound now.  BUT, today was good.  I was super productive at work, I got girl scout cookies from a co-worker, and had a rather uplifting conversation with my boss.  Doctors told my boss and his wife point blank that they would never have kids of their own.  Well, his wife is pregnant with their second child.  He would not take no for an answer and neither will we.


  1. Just catching up - I'm so sorry you are going through this! I pray that you get pregnant soon. My husband and I are trying and I find myself in shock that I'm not pregnant after a few months, which I realize it completely unrealistic. I'm now peeing on things and taking my temperature. A trip to the doctor in a few more months will be the next step. I'm 36, so I can't help but feel that my age is working against me (even though my friends say it's not, but what do they know?). Anyway, just having those expectations for ourselves and our futures--hurts when they don't happen the way we thought.

  2. Oh, Katie, that's so tough. I'm glad that you're surrounded by testimonies of people who have gone through the same thing--the story of your boss and his wife now having their 2nd child is amazing. I admire your persistence in refusing to take no for an answer.